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11/08/09 at 09:29 PM by refgirl23
Sometimes I feel like I live in a slightly different world than everyone else.

I know I chose to do this to myself 3 Senior level science courses with labs, working two different jobs that normally average close to 10 hours per week for each...and it was all in the name of getting me where I need to go. I'm so burnt out at the moment, I'd prefer to sit and stare at the ceiling then going and doing the work I know I so clearly need to do to stay afloat.

This semester has been a long one, full of ups, downs, and what the hells. i found out I had a friend or two who considered me one of their best friends and I really didn't know I had done anything to deserve that title. I liked a guy who ended up liking one of my friends, and I told her she had to go for it if she thought she might like him...and its now becoming obvious to me as to why I wasn't supposed to be involved in that equation-- he's slowly appearing to be one of the superficial nice guys who are actually jackasses at the core. So I'm probably going to have to kick his ass...verbally of course.

I'm going to end up making a D in a course and accepting it, as the course is only offered once a year, and I wouldn't dare re-take it.
Lastly, I'm applying to go into a doctoral program next year.

Who in the world let me become this much of an adult? Enough of an adult that some of my dreams are nearly in my grasp...and yet, no one really understands, as they're not what your stereotypical 21 or 22 year old's dreams are. I've always been told that's the difference. That's why only so many people get me at this moment, I'm going to have to be surrounded by other me's to have someone who understands. The closest I have came to having someone is a friend of a friend who is miles away finishing his master's at Tech, so not like that does me any good.

The next level comes in 7 months. I'm surprisingly excited, but still somewhat nostalgic. This town will always be better than my birthplace. Because Auburn is home.
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