So today I decided to go for a run before class and try to catch breakfast I woke up too late and ended up missing breakfast but I still ran. So I shower after my run and get my stuff together really quick and then I grab a pop-tart on my way out.
I walk down the hall to the elevator and say hi to my RA. I then take a big bite of my pop tart as this girl who I've been wanting to talk to walks in and looks at me. So the two of us get on the elevator but don't stop for six floors. By the time we reach the lobby I was done and never got to say a word to her. But I've made it a point to make it a little earlier to my floor lobby on Tuesdays and Thursday the rest of the semester.
Yes that's a made up word from my old English teacher. WHere's something I wrote in that class out of bordem
As an 18 year old male I've liked my fair share of girls and the follwoing is a list of what would encompass the perfect girl in my eyes.
-will be between 5'7'' -5'9''
-either a swimmer or unner (endurance duh!)
-long dark hair about chest length
-this might sounbd weird but a long thin nose. ( i cant explain it but its just a turn on for me)
-brown eyes (for van morriosons brown eyed girl)
-green eyes for nfg's "hold my hand" and say anything's "shiska"
-have as much respect and love for NFG&TSL as I do
- love the following tv shows: the oc,m seinfeld, entourage, the office
-think gene simmons is the shizzz
-have somwhat of respect for the following movies: fight club, beerfest, knocked up and the notebook
- think chuck klosterman is a great writer
-think prince is great at combining many genres in an awesome way
-would rather read a newspaper, magazine, or something like that over a boring novel
-laugh at my lame jokes
-someone who thinks intellectually about stupid things
-lets me make fun of them
-has verizon "in texting/calling"
-have respect for herself
-gets all of my pop culture refrences
So I would have done this yesterday but I was WAY too tired to do anything that was a lot of work.
Yesterday was my last high school race ever. I've been running cross country and track since my freshman year and have made life long friends through it. In track I used to do the 110 and 330 hurdles but stopped after sophomore year since we had gone through three coaches in 2 years with only one actually helping out. So going into my junior year I decided to switch over to distance hoping to do good in the mile. I didn't and ended up specializing in the 2 mile. I ran a fast time the week before league (11:10) and then the following week I ran an 11:26. And after that race I was soo close to quitting track. Well XC season came and went and I wasn't really happy with how I did so I decided to do track, because if I didn't I knew I would regret it.
My goal that I had set with my sometimes coach (my real coach couldn't give a shit about anyone else except our #1 guy) was to break 10:50 and place top 5. In this blog I'm gonna break down my thoughts before during and after the race in segments.
Warm-Up: The meet was WAY ahead of schedule which was kind of freaking me out since I ate half a 12 inch sub from Subway thinking I would have more time to digest it. I get into the meat of my warm-up when I begin to get a side cramp. At first I freaked because I can not keep my form when I have a cramp. But I get over it by telling myself that it would be gone by the time my race started.
1st Lap: I line up fifth from the inside (seeded by submitted times) and get out pretty good. I position myself behind my friend who is hanging in third. We come in and 72 seconds. Pretty good.
2nd Lap: The number one guys starts to pull away fast from the rest fo us but I still hold my pace thinking about not letting my left arm drop. Came in fast than 230 which was kinda fast.
3rd Lap: i Begin to pull away from my teammate and fall into third place. i come in around the 200 mark and then some Otay guy (#1 school) comes up behind me and steals my third place.
4th Lap: I start to slow down a little here but I still have a pretty good first mile as i come in at 5:15. It was pretty fast when I first though of it since my PR for the mile is 5:08 but I get over it.
5th Lap: Again I slow down a little here and in my head I' was thinking about this girl and whether or not she was looking at me race but I needed to stay focused on the race. I come in feeling good about where I am and soon begin thinking about moving up since the three Otay guys are WAY ahead.
6th Lap: At the beginning of this lap I start to fall a little bit behind as it sets in that I won't be getting the win. As I come around on the home stretch my coach yells me telling me that I'm two seconds behind what I need to be and to pick it up. With the straightaway and the crowd I open up my stride a little.
7th Lap: The last two laps I would ever run in high school. Thats what I told myself the whole week leading up to that. I pick it up slowly and begin to think how I will do. I come in at 9:30 and feel a sense of possibility that I might break 10:40. So I think about all those hard workouts I had and how much it will pay off.
8th Lap: I try my hardest to go all out but it's very hard to actually get the will to go. I come in on the back stretch and lengthen my stride. I begin to hurt a little and hold it back until the 150 mark. At that point I'm in sprinter mode and trying to get under 1040 as I see the seconds get closer to it. I'm about 50 yards away and relaize it's not going to happen which causes me to slow down a little bit. About 10 meters away i see that I can make the 1045 and spoeed up into the finish line.
Post Race: I get out of the chute and barf up my sandwich I had earlier. It wasn't fun but it was a good way to end my high school career.
I've been wandering around here for a few weeks. At first I was actually tryin got head somewhere , but now it just seems like I'm lost. Honestly I've been lost but never like this, and it's kinda scaring the shit out of me. It's so hard to see more than 15 feet ahead of me because of all these tress around me.
You might be wondering why I've been walking around for the past three weeks. Well back at home I had nothing going for me. Well I did, I just wasn't happy with what I was getting. I had a decent job creating the score for the show, I had an apartment with a collection of art that was becoming respectable, and most importantly (to you not to me)was the girlfriend that I had that loved me. I know everyone wants to be loved and I was one of those lucky guys, the thing is though is I was not really giving any love back. It's not like she was clingy, trust me she was great, I just couldn't find it in myself to love her and it bothered me too much. I guess you could say this is why I ran away from the reality of the above thought.
That is what I wrote in my journal today for my English class and read aloud. After I read it my teacher gave me a look of confusion as he always does when I read my "odd" journals.
Everything was good until after lunch when one of my friends asked me if the journal I read today was about my ex. She was right near me, so I whispered my friend no while giving a look of hatred for asking that. Honestly, do you really think anything I'm going to write about girls is about her? Um no it wasn't. I wrote that based off of my interpretation of Person L's "Storms" I was obviously writing a little short story about it and adding some characterization to it. So that is why it started out like that. I wasn't even finished yet I just need to read it to get the points I need in the class.
That wasn't the only incident with the journal. i had my best friend's girlfriend ( who is also a good friend of mine) tell me to be nicer to my ex.
She said that because she's "been noticing that I've been more mean to her recently."
I asked her "what specifically are you talking about?"
"The journal you read today, duh. That was pretty messed up of you to read it today," she replied.
"really, you thought it was about her?" I said with a sense of anger " It was something I didn't finish but I wanted to read today so yeah."
Fuck man. People need to grow up. That shit pissed me off so much today.