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.invisible ink.'s Blog
seven hours and fifteen days
04/17/12 at 05:09 PM by .invisible ink.


I think the original sung by Sinead O'Connor is still far more powerful and hits me like a ton of bricks but there's something nice about this cover, despite Dustin's brief fuck-up and the complete irony that the person who inspires me to dwell on this song despises Dustin Kensrue and the rest of Thrice or at least their music tremendously.

Tags: jordan
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Fate
04/11/12 at 09:01 PM by .invisible ink.
I can't stop crying. I know it's been weeks since we broke up and I should be getting better but I'm not. I'm in so much pain. I'm so fucking lonely now. You were the only thing keeping me going and I didn't want to admit it but I don't have a choice at this point. And yet, I can't go back to the way we were. I was a prisoner. I know you loved me as best as you could and I know that I wanted it to be enough so badly and I couldn't make it so. I have been trying to distract myself from my feelings with the weed that is now running low and the throwaway boys that talk to me and don't mean a thing but when I take away those distractions I'm left with pure and total misery and longing and wondering what I could have done differently to have made you love me in the way I needed and deserved. I'm so worried about how you feel now but don't want to think about how I feel. I don't want to feel anything.

I daydream about holding a bolt gun up to my head and just pulling the trigger and making it all go away. I'm not to that point right now but I'm sure it won't be too many years off that I take the plunge and go for it, as sad and sick as that may seem. Life just hasn't turned out the way it was meant to. Time is slipping away and I'm left with nothing to show for it.

I'm so lost and empty. I just want to disappear and make it all disappear.


"Fate"
by Lydia

It's just, it's just I can't seem to fall asleep these days
And you can't seem to stop digging this grave

'Cause you were only eighteen at the time
And I was holding up these streets just fine
Come on, oh, come on

Place me on your scene and I'll take
Everything that you ever said to me
No, it wasn't just words
(No, it wasn't just words)
But day after day after day
I call that fate

Oh, darling I've been thinking about you
And you are thinking how much fun it was
Filling up our lungs

But don't you just see what's happened?
Yeah, we never stay lonely, come on

Place me on your scene and I'll take
Everything that you ever said to me
No, it wasn't just words
(No, it wasn't just words)
But day after day after day
I call that fate

(I can't bare to see you)
Place me on your scene and I'll take
(Staring at the ceiling)
Everything that you ever said to me
No, it wasn't just words
(No, it wasn't just words)
Day after day after day
I call that

(I can't bare to see you)
Place me on your scene and I'll take
(Staring at the ceiling)
Everything that you ever said to me
No, it wasn't just words
(No, it wasn't just words)
Day after day after day
I call that fate

Tags: jordan, lydia, fate
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