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Blowing Off Some Steam
Stress, Depression, Life, Death, and Tests
04/21/11 at 06:48 PM by SteamCrow
That title is one hell of a thing to follow. Anyway, kind of diving headfirst into my cold concrete pool of depression. Needless to say, it kind of sucks being the only one in the water. I don't know what to say really. School was decent, but I was kind of falling off the edge of the Earth by the time it was over. Traffic was hell and I was fifteen minutes late to work, which led to me being lectured/ bitched at for half an hour straight mainly about things that I didn't do or have since corrected in the last two weeks (I work in reception and deal mostly with scheduling appointments. Conveniently, we're normally booked for about two weeks so the appointments that I messed up on two weeks ago are just now starting to show up). I like my job, but with all the shit that I have to deal with from school anyway, its getting to be too much already.

So, basically, I have about 20-30 pages worth of take home tests in my Honors Abnormal Psychology class (2 separate tests- 10 questions each) of which I only have 3 pages done (with a single question). I have a 15 page English paper that I'm working on that also needs to be accompanied by an in-class presentation. My English teacher, by the way, has pretty much decided that she hates our class and has so far cancelled the last three classes because she gets that everyone (including me) thinks she's an idiot. Also, its Honors English 102. What other fun stuff... In my photography class, my final portfolio is due next week. In my drawing class, I have about 3/4 of the semester's worth of work to finish and turn in, as well as the exam which the teacher has apparently decided will be an in-class one. In my History of Graphic Design class, we get our take home exam on Tuesday and I was chosen to be the first person to present my presentation (which I haven't started on).

So on top of that, being held accountable for every last detail of my work as well as coming home to the shit I live with at the moment, I am understandably fucked up. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I've already had several major mental/ depressive breakdowns in the last few months. I know its my fault I'm in this spot and I know I'm the only one who can fix it. I'd rather not go down at all, but if I do, I'd rather go down fighting than whimpering in the corner being bitched at by the rest of the world. Fuck them. Right now, I am all I need to get past this.
Tags: suicide, depression, stress, life, school, finals, exams, whatfuckingever you want
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School. Title Fight.
04/21/11 at 08:23 AM by SteamCrow
Not much going on really. Getting beaten over the head by end of the semester work and Portal 2. Anyway, just a general observation concerning Title Fight. When you listen to Last Thing You Forget and Shed back to back, the transition is actually subtle despite the radical differences one may hear when listening to the two in separate sessions. Songs like "Where Am I" easily throw back to some like "Western Haikus"
Tags: college, school, break, semester, work, homework tests, i'm hungry, Title Fight, Shed
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Dead and/or Dying
04/19/11 at 07:28 AM by SteamCrow
Well that's a very important and/or statement. Anyway, I'm at school right now with two and a half hours until my next class, so I'm just chilling and for some odd reason, listening to Balance and Composure. I need coffee. brb...

Aaaaaaaand back. With coffee! and pizza! School pizza, mind you. One of those single serving ones. They're actually pretty good; tastes kind of like Red Baron pizza. Messy though. Anyway, strange combination, but good. Strange and good is good. I think I had a point I was going to make when I got back but have since forgotten it. Still listening to Balance and Composure, wearing one of their shirts too. I got it when I saw them, Title Fight, Bayside, and Senses Fail last year. Amazing show. I think half the crowd left for Senses Fail, which was funny. Bayside's guitarist played an epic 10-minute long solo for no particular reason. Besides that, I was there mainly for Title Fight, who were awesome. Seeing them again in June.

Anyway, I'm being ADHD as hell as you can probably tell. Unintentional rhyme. I am going to go now so I can contemplate doing my homework
Tags: college, school, break, semester, work, homework tests, i'm hungry, ADD, ADHD
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Last Updated: 05/04/11 (2,482 Views)
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