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Tell me, who's pulling the strings?
Beer or Sports?
08/12/09 at 12:00 AM by donwagenblast
In light of the vh1 show The Great Debate, I've decided to post things I'd love to see debated here on AP.net. All of these topics are ones that I feel deserved to be on the show, and I'd like to give them at least some of the attention they deserve on the site. Here comes the first:

Which has been a better gift for men: beer or sports?
And now, the arguments for both sides:

Beer- While some may argue that it can cause more harm than good, there is no denying the power beer can have over men. It can turn them into hilarious klutzes, horndogs with the insatiable lust for unprotected sex, a ticking time bomb for vomit, or the most relaxed person in the world. Whichever one you get, a good time likely ensues. This causes men to gather together for festivities that would otherwise be considered incredibly mundane and boring into crazy excursions into the land of intoxication. Beer has been responsible for quite a few comedies in the movie business, and musicians rely on it heavily to get over a hard day's touring (groupies, free food, screaming fans, I'm sure it's a rough life). Since its creation, beer has become the backbone of the working man, providing him a moment of relaxation before the next day's labors are faced. Beer has become the staple of television, with countless ads (some with nothing to do with the actual product) flood the TV screens day after day. Put simply, beer has a stranglehold on American culture: men love it, women tolerate it, underaged teens want to risk criminal charges to try it. As poetic as that sounds, what's even scarier is that it's more or less the truth.

Sports- Since the first cavemen began clubbing eachother to see who could endure the most pain, competition has been in the bloodwork of all men. Whether its competing physically in sports or mentally in fantasy sports, men have flocked to stadiums across the world to root for their teams, shedding tears of both joy and pain throughout the ups and downs of the team. This sounds an awful lot like a cult, but it is entirely normal worldwide. No matter what sport it is, there will always be a party to watch a game, an illegal bet or two around the office, or an up-and-coming superstar finding the inspiration to put their name in conversation with the all-time greats. Imitation is the greatest form of flattery, and sports developed an entirely new way for their fans to imitate their heroes: video games. With Madden and FIFA and everything else out there, sports figures are now available for download at any time the fan wishes, allowing for a more enjoyable career, and life.

The verdict: I have to go with sports, because beer really has no chance. Here's why: what's one of the main reasons to have a few drinks with your buddies? Answer: sports. Whether it's a pregame tailgate in the freezing cold at a football game or putting on your team-colored Snuggie to show off to your friends, sports will forever dominate this debate. More idol worship, more knowledge of the people involved, more television coverage (yes, beer gets the commercials, but sports are the actual show you're watching), and more movies (list every sports movie ever made, I dare you) equals more relevancy in the minds of the male.

While both sides have very legitimate arguments and both seem to make men return to their primitive state, beer and sports will forever be linked, but in reality, it's all about the love of the game.

Did I miss anything? Did I get it completely wrong? Let the debate begin.
Tags: sports, drinking, beer, debate
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