AbsolutePunk.net
   Username
Password
When wiping your bum, what do you do?
stay seated on the toilet to wipe 87 39.01%
stand up to wipe 98 43.95%
somewhere in between 38 17.04%
Voters: 223. You may not vote on this poll

 
Share
01:54 PM on 04/26/12 
Offline
User Info.
AussieBoy
AussieBoy's Avatar
Bondi Beach, Sydney
Male
^ This. Why the hell would you sit down to wipe? You're just dragging it up your gooch to your ball sack. Such a weird fuckin' way to wipe

i used to stand up, but in the last year i've stayed sitting down, mainly from laziness, but i have dragged on my gooch and cags a few times, i'll need to go back to standing, plus my doodle gets in the way trying to wipe sitting down a bit
07:54 PM on 04/26/12 
Offline
User Info.
incognitojones
http://auburn-hills.tumblr.com
incognitojones's Avatar
Always stand up to wipe.

But I stand up to shit too, so I'm kind of biased.
08:46 PM on 04/26/12 
Offline
User Info.
Carolie97
Registered User
No Avatar Selected
Female - 33 Years Old
Its not an option smalls.
10:37 PM on 04/26/12 
Offline
User Info.
ImTheSheriff
///
ImTheSheriff's Avatar
Male - 25 Years Old
My friends always thought I was weird for standing up.

one time my friend walked in on me while i was standing up about to wipe my ass and when i came out he was like "why the fuck were you standing up?"

i don't know why anyone sits down to wipe, you can't get as clean you sick fucks.
10:48 PM on 04/26/12 
Offline
User Info.
AussieBoy
AussieBoy's Avatar
Bondi Beach, Sydney
Male
i cant picture what people mean by standing. Like still bent over squatting with ass over the toilet seat or like fully standing wiping your ass like a retard

Standing as though you were just about to leap up like a cat. Knees bent, calves straining
10:54 PM on 04/26/12 
Offline
User Info.
thesafeword
-
thesafeword's Avatar
Portland, OR
Male
If your ass leaves the seat at all it counts as standing up? Not sure how you can do it sitting down then, unless you wipe in between your legs and smear shit all over your balls you fucking weirdo.
11:12 PM on 04/26/12 
Offline
User Info.
AussieBoy
AussieBoy's Avatar
Bondi Beach, Sydney
Male
the fuck then why don't you just do the one leaned cheek on the seat? much easier and you don't risk falling over like an idiot

if after 24yrs i somehow fall over for the first time this week and get shitty toilet paper all over me, then yeah i'll change to that way.
11:52 PM on 04/26/12 
Offline
User Info.
BusterBluth
@edgarallentoe
BusterBluth's Avatar
frozen tundra
Male - 21 Years Old
one time my friend walked in on me while i was standing up about to wipe my ass and when i came out he was like "why the fuck were you standing up?"

i don't know why anyone sits down to wipe, you can't get as clean you sick fucks.

exactly. I want to get as clean as possible.
11:53 PM on 04/26/12 
Offline
User Info.
BusterBluth
@edgarallentoe
BusterBluth's Avatar
frozen tundra
Male - 21 Years Old
Is anyone besides me comfortable enough with their friends to shit with the door open and talk to them?
10:30 AM on 04/27/12 
Online
User Info.
brook183
Leave the lunchmeat for the sharks
brook183's Avatar
Southgate, MI
Male - 23 Years Old
Why would anyone stand up and wipe? Your butt-cheeks would smush anything that's there.

Exactly!
12:22 PM on 04/27/12 
Offline
User Info.
Tristan Needler
This is forever.
Tristan Needler's Avatar
London, ON
Male - 27 Years Old
Standing to wipe is patently retarded. Stay seated, one cheek up, in from the side. End of debate.
01:56 PM on 04/27/12 
Offline
User Info.
KenneyBN
will be gone till July 2015 on mish
KenneyBN's Avatar
Edmonton, AB
Male - 20 Years Old
the fuck then why don't you just do the one leaned cheek on the seat? much easier and you don't risk falling over like an idiot
Do you have troubles standing up on a regular basis? Its not that big of a risk.


Also for every other fool that thinks you just up stand up straight when you wipe standing, I took some time to sketch out a re-enactment of the "Stand Up Wipe". Watch and learn kids, because this is how you got the job done clean.


image hosting
02:01 PM on 04/27/12 
Offline
User Info.
ImTheSheriff
///
ImTheSheriff's Avatar
Male - 25 Years Old
Why would anyone stand up and wipe? Your butt-cheeks would smush anything that's there.

Do you wipe before your finished shitting?
03:48 PM on 04/27/12 
Offline
User Info.
AussieBoy
AussieBoy's Avatar
Bondi Beach, Sydney
Male
Do you have troubles standing up on a regular basis? Its not that big of a risk.


Also for every other fool that thinks you just up stand up straight when you wipe standing, I took some time to sketch out a re-enactment of the "Stand Up Wipe". Watch and learn kids, because this is how you got the job done clean.


image hosting

Hahaha. This exactly!
03:53 PM on 04/27/12 
Offline
User Info.
AussieBoy
AussieBoy's Avatar
Bondi Beach, Sydney
Male
thats retarded just lean your cheek

I don't see why Tristian and yourself are getting so upset about it all.
Not everything works for everyone.
I often change it up through out my life and the situation.
Some might be easier for fatties, some for twig people.

See what would you do in those nasty public toilets or the pub loos where there's filth seat and you have to kanga squat over it and don't wanna touch bowl. You gotta change it up my mate



NEWS, MUSIC & MORE
Search News
Release Dates
Exclusives
Best New Music
Articles
CONNECT
Submit News
Forums
Contests
Mobile Version
AP.net Logos
HIDDEN TREASURES
AbsolutePunk Podcast
Free Music
Sports Forum
Technology Forum
Recommendations
INFORMATION
Advertising
Contact Us
Copyright Policy
Terms of Service
Privacy Policy
FOLLOW
Twitter | Facebook | RSS
PropertyOfZack
UnderTheGun
Purevolume
Chorus.fm | @jason_tate