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04:59 AM on 06/11/10 
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terror_91
I feel sorry for the elephants
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Notts/Manc, UK
Male - 23 Years Old
Let me give it to you straight, AP.

So My ex and I broke up, oh about 40 minutes ago. We dated for almost 2 years and had many ups and downs but I always went out on a limb for her, always put her first and tried to make her happy. Last summer she got drunk and fooled around with some guy and I was a wreck about that for so long. I've dealt with it pretty well and I stayed with her through it. I don't know if I regret it or not because I really do love her and we ended up having many a great times even after that all happened.

I had some minor depression problems before that little incident last summer and if anything, that whole situation amplified it so much more and I've been dealing with it ever since.

(For some insight, after it happened, i lost 20 pounds over 3 days from not eating. It's not that I didn't want to, my body physically couldn't.)

We argued more, I was seeing a counselor at college for some time and to be honest, it really helped. Going on meds has been a lasting issue in my head and I really want to try and make it without them but I digress.

We argued a lot more, my temper was shorter and to be honest, there was a part of me that still resented her but I tried to dilute it as much as I could through time. Underneath it all, i know she really hates herself for doing it and i think it really snowballed into the roots of most of our problems today. Well, yesterday.

See I know people argue. It just happens when you're around someone for so long. You take them for granted and sometimes its not as easy as you may want it to be. But relationships take a lot of work once you get going at them. It's not all fucking butterflies and snowflakes. Her reasons for not wanting to continue our relationship was that she was exhausted from arguing and generally unhappy - a fact that until now, I was pretty much oblivious to. She is horrible at communicating how she feels and when we do argue, I tend to lead the conversation. Lately her temper has been much shorter, she's increasingly defensive and snippy. And she doesn't realize that it doesn't help a thing. It makes them so much worse and all the while, i'm trying to work on my attitude and be patient. How am i supposed to accomplish anything when she is doing the opposite? It's so difficult.

And i mention all this shit stuff because well, I feel like shit. But I love spending time with her and I truely don't understand how 'unhappy' she can be. We have a great time together. Inside jokes, active lifestyles, the works. She is really nice to be around. I'm so lost, you know?

In all honesty, I'm doing better then I should be, mostly because we've come so close to breaking up before, that I've suffered through a lot of it already. But the ONE thing that gets me is all the parties she will go to and all of the guys she will meet, make out with and fuck. I swear, that's the shittiest thing I'm feeling about right now. Nothing makes me more upset because I had liberties with her body and herself that other guys are going to get to enjoy now. Son of a bitch.

That was all very cut and dry, but I had to get it out of my head. I've gone through so much with this girl, good and bad. And if tomorrow, she decided she wanted to get back together and that she would genuinely try better to communicate, I would get back with her in a second. Reading this, yep. Sounds fucking crazy. But I would really look forward to what could come of us if she made some changes like I have and decided it was all really worth it. I'm really broken up about it and I'm really afraid of how I'm going to feel given my deeply depressive history.

But if worse comes to worse, there's this really hot chick who works in the library that i've been dying to meet.


EDIT: And it blows that this happens to be my 412th post, because she's from Pittsburgh and that's the area code. Fack.
I'm sorry. I hope you feel better. I think what your best option is is to go and speak to a counsellor because it has helped you in the past. You need to look out for yourself.

You are over-thinking it as well. Her post code is the same as the post number? Who gives a fuck? She uses a computer as well so computers will remind you of her! She has a grasp of the english language like you do and all other english people do! Everything can be traced back to someone so don't do that to yourself.

From the general gist I've got from the post, I think you will be better off without her. Take sometime to make sure that you are alright and head for the library girl. Best of luck bud.
05:21 AM on 06/11/10 
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ChelseaRiane
<3
ChelseaRiane's Avatar
Buffalo, NY
Female - 22 Years Old
I'm dealing with a break up as we speak. Not so good.
10:17 AM on 06/11/10 
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IJTKJH
I am Jack's smirking revenge.
IJTKJH's Avatar
Draper, Utah
Male - 23 Years Old
Let me give it to you straight, AP.

So My ex and I broke up, oh about 40 minutes ago. We dated for almost 2 years and had many ups and downs but I always went out on a limb for her, always put her first and tried to make her happy. Last summer she got drunk and fooled around with some guy and I was a wreck about that for so long. I've dealt with it pretty well and I stayed with her through it. I don't know if I regret it or not because I really do love her and we ended up having many a great times even after that all happened.

I had some minor depression problems before that little incident last summer and if anything, that whole situation amplified it so much more and I've been dealing with it ever since.

(For some insight, after it happened, i lost 20 pounds over 3 days from not eating. It's not that I didn't want to, my body physically couldn't.)

We argued more, I was seeing a counselor at college for some time and to be honest, it really helped. Going on meds has been a lasting issue in my head and I really want to try and make it without them but I digress.

We argued a lot more, my temper was shorter and to be honest, there was a part of me that still resented her but I tried to dilute it as much as I could through time. Underneath it all, i know she really hates herself for doing it and i think it really snowballed into the roots of most of our problems today. Well, yesterday.

See I know people argue. It just happens when you're around someone for so long. You take them for granted and sometimes its not as easy as you may want it to be. But relationships take a lot of work once you get going at them. It's not all fucking butterflies and snowflakes. Her reasons for not wanting to continue our relationship was that she was exhausted from arguing and generally unhappy - a fact that until now, I was pretty much oblivious to. She is horrible at communicating how she feels and when we do argue, I tend to lead the conversation. Lately her temper has been much shorter, she's increasingly defensive and snippy. And she doesn't realize that it doesn't help a thing. It makes them so much worse and all the while, i'm trying to work on my attitude and be patient. How am i supposed to accomplish anything when she is doing the opposite? It's so difficult.

And i mention all this shit stuff because well, I feel like shit. But I love spending time with her and I truely don't understand how 'unhappy' she can be. We have a great time together. Inside jokes, active lifestyles, the works. She is really nice to be around. I'm so lost, you know?

In all honesty, I'm doing better then I should be, mostly because we've come so close to breaking up before, that I've suffered through a lot of it already. But the ONE thing that gets me is all the parties she will go to and all of the guys she will meet, make out with and fuck. I swear, that's the shittiest thing I'm feeling about right now. Nothing makes me more upset because I had liberties with her body and herself that other guys are going to get to enjoy now. Son of a bitch.

That was all very cut and dry, but I had to get it out of my head. I've gone through so much with this girl, good and bad. And if tomorrow, she decided she wanted to get back together and that she would genuinely try better to communicate, I would get back with her in a second. Reading this, yep. Sounds fucking crazy. But I would really look forward to what could come of us if she made some changes like I have and decided it was all really worth it. I'm really broken up about it and I'm really afraid of how I'm going to feel given my deeply depressive history.

But if worse comes to worse, there's this really hot chick who works in the library that i've been dying to meet.


EDIT: And it blows that this happens to be my 412th post, because she's from Pittsburgh and that's the area code. Fack.

Damn, I'm really sorry. I just went through pretty much the same thing. It's shitty when someone suddenly tells you that they're unhappy just becasue of a few arguments especially when you feel like you're doing everything you can to make them happy. You're definitely right when you say that people just start taking each other for granted and how relationships stop being just "butterflies and snowflakes". After so long, there just isn't anything new and exciting about a relationship. You don't get butterflies in your stomach when you see them, you don't always wonder if they're thinking about you, you don't check your phone every 30 seconds to see if they've texted you. That's just life I guess.

But in my opinion, if she wants to get back with you, don't do it. I've made that mistake twice already and it's been great for a little bit, and we both do our best to change for the better and make each other happy, but after awhile, we both just resort back to our old habbits and we put each other through the same shit again. I don't necessarily know your entire situation with her, but I think you need to let go at least for now. Maybe try again in a year or something, but if you go back to her and this happens again, you'll just feel as shitty as you do now. Maybe hit up the hot girl in the library. Honestly, this might sound bad, but I think the best thing in the world for these situations is a good solid rebound. Someone to give you attention because that's what everyone misses the most.

Hope the best for you... Oh yeah, and if you just post something else, it won't be her area code anymore. Easy fix.
11:41 AM on 06/11/10 
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bunneh.
make moves, son
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585
Male - 24 Years Old
Yeah I don't know what's going to happen. I've had the chance to talk to a surprising amount of people today, some i havent talked to in a long time, some are longtime friends. I've been listening to acoustic versions of Shake It Out by Manchester Orchestra and I haven't heard a word from her. I don't know if I will. Everything was completely abrupt and we've been through much worse than we have been dealing with recently. Relationships take work and I was always the one who kept fighting and she's the one who just gives up.

I feel really sad but when she cheated on me last summer, that felt a million times worse. I'm afraid it hasn't hit me yet because I feel like I could be much more upset. But I don't really know for sure. I'm kind of afraid.
09:05 PM on 06/17/10 
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limepomegranate
giving you a hot beef injection
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Lexington, KY
Female - 24 Years Old
My boyfriend broke up with me last night but now he's asked me to go to his mother's this weekend which I am which I know is stupid. But he also asked me today to go help pressure wash his grandparents driveway like we had planned the other day or to just come to his grandparents house. I said no. I don't understand why he keeps asking to hang out and stuff when he broke my heart. I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like i'm going to be sick.
03:01 AM on 06/22/10 
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glamchic22
Newbie
No Avatar Selected
New York
Female
I broke up with my boyfriend and I don't know if I did the right thing. My boyfriend was sick with cancer a year ago, he never went into remission, I was supportive all the time, but he has a few months and he is getting weaker, but at the same time it was getting harder. I had fights with him and his family as well because I needed time to process things. Something bad had happened to him a days ago, a lot of complications had come through and he was getting harder to deal with and I had my job and I just could not take it so I broke it off. I know it now sounds heartless, because I love him still but somehow I feel that I have let him down. I don't know how to go back and say sorry, his family is really angry and told me to get out and to stay away. I truly regret what I did, I do want to say sorry because I know he has a few months or even weeks left. I want him still to fight. But I'm left at a loss already at the moment, anyone ever experience this? Please help
06:16 AM on 06/22/10 
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terror_91
I feel sorry for the elephants
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Notts/Manc, UK
Male - 23 Years Old
I broke up with my boyfriend and I don't know if I did the right thing. My boyfriend was sick with cancer a year ago, he never went into remission, I was supportive all the time, but he has a few months and he is getting weaker, but at the same time it was getting harder. I had fights with him and his family as well because I needed time to process things. Something bad had happened to him a days ago, a lot of complications had come through and he was getting harder to deal with and I had my job and I just could not take it so I broke it off. I know it now sounds heartless, because I love him still but somehow I feel that I have let him down. I don't know how to go back and say sorry, his family is really angry and told me to get out and to stay away. I truly regret what I did, I do want to say sorry because I know he has a few months or even weeks left. I want him still to fight. But I'm left at a loss already at the moment, anyone ever experience this? Please help
Selfish.
06:46 AM on 06/22/10 
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glamchic22
Newbie
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New York
Female

I know it is selfish, i do wanna go back and ask for forgiveness, but how? I know I made the mistake. Do you think he would take me back if I came to him and admit I was wrong?
06:48 AM on 06/22/10 
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terror_91
I feel sorry for the elephants
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Notts/Manc, UK
Male - 23 Years Old
I know it is selfish, i do wanna go back and ask for forgiveness, but how? I know I made the mistake. Do you think he would take me back if I came to him and admit I was wrong?
How the fuck am I meant to know? Will he?

If you want to go back and ask for forgiveness, do fucking exactly that.

"Boyfriend, I am sorry I left you. Will you forgive me and take me back?"

Why the fuck does this need spelling out?
06:54 AM on 06/22/10 
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glamchic22
Newbie
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New York
Female
How the fuck am I meant to know? Will he?

If you want to go back and ask for forgiveness, do fucking exactly that.

"Boyfriend, I am sorry I left you. Will you forgive me and take me back?"

Why the fuck does this need spelling out?

woah... i was just asking. sorry.
06:57 AM on 06/22/10 
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glamchic22
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New York
Female
woah... i was just asking. sorry.

its complicated when you are in the situation.
06:58 AM on 06/22/10 
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glamchic22
Newbie
No Avatar Selected
New York
Female
How the fuck am I meant to know? Will he?

If you want to go back and ask for forgiveness, do fucking exactly that.

"Boyfriend, I am sorry I left you. Will you forgive me and take me back?"

Why the fuck does this need spelling out?

its complicated when you are in the situation.
07:30 AM on 06/22/10 
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terror_91
I feel sorry for the elephants
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Notts/Manc, UK
Male - 23 Years Old
woah... i was just asking. sorry.
You asked so I gave you an answer and what you were asking were fucking useless questions and I still devoted my thought and time to give you the best possible solution.
04:08 PM on 06/24/10 
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AgainstTheCurrent
Paranoid Humanoid.
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OH/NYC
Male - 20 Years Old
You asked so I gave you an answer and what you were asking were fucking useless questions and I still devoted my thought and time to give you the best possible solution.

I agree with this.

You probably feel like shit for breaking up with him in his situation. I'm not gonna try make you feel worse, but you have to fix that situation immediately. Before it's too late.
07:29 AM on 06/27/10 
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Bodich26
Registered User
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u
Male - 30 Years Old
Dumpsville could also imply that you smell like shit.



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