2. How did this band get started?
Joseph begged friends that lived near him to play music over ridiculous lyrics he had thought of whilst working an overnight shift at a Kinko's. Comrades from the "International Nihilist's League" decided to join him for the first incarnation of persona!, since then, Joseph has randomly combed the phone sex ads from Craigslist to fill the roster.
3. What bands are you influenced by?
Shudder to Think, Tom Waits, Brian Eno, Bad Brains
4. If you could tour with any bands, past or present, who would it be and why?
Gogol Bordello would be fun as hell to tour with for the dancing, Sweet would be grand for the sex and Tom Waits would be amazing for the war stories.
5. If you were a furry, what animal would you be? Why that animal?
If I were to be a Furry (I assume you mean one of those freaks that like to dress up in furry costumes for perv pleasures), I would def dress up as a panda bear with many holes cut out. That or a giant sloth. Not sure why the panda but the sloth is such a perfect combo of terror and cuddles.
6. Why should people listen to your band?
My band gives that special funny feeling in the pit of the stomach, you'll be compelled to either vomit or make out with your brother after hearing such hits as "My Best Weight" and "Let's Go Again". in this land of bland nothing that passes for music these days, don't you want to be the first to discover how freaking different and cool we are? Yes. Yes you do.
7. If you were chosen to be in Guitar Hero/Rock Band, what song would you want in the game? How hard do you think it would be to five-star on expert?
I would want "My Best Weight" or "Tension". It would be Impossible to 5 star because the notes in those songs don't exist in real life.
8. If you won a Grammy, who would you thank?
What's a Grammy?
9. If you could change something about the music industry, what would it be?
I would change the fact that I'm not famous enough to have my face embroidered on the jeans of every hot chick's ass in Philadelphia
10. Memorable tour experience?
Olympia, Washington and the crunchy gutter punk kid's dred-locks that I bled all over via a self inflicted wine glass wound from jumping off stage onto a table. I didn't even miss a note and pulled something in my crotch.
11. What does AP.net mean to you?
AP.net is fun and informative and I swear I'm not getting paid. It's also smart, funny and popular with the ladies.
12. What is your favorite song to play?
Blackdog from Led Zeppelin even though I don't know how to play it. That and "Let's Go Again"'s dull yet hypnotic riff.
14. What music reminds you of your childhood?
Grind-core and the Streisand songs my drunk uncle used to sing to me
15. If you could have any super power, what would it be? Why?
I would want to actually be invisible instead of just feeling that way all the time.
16. Do you feel that your band has "made it"?
If my band "made it" I would be paying someone else to be witty for this interview.
17. What is something that most fans don't know about you?
I weep uncontrollably over anything sentimental. When I was in 1st grade, I formed a club called the "Jacknife Club" and we would go around and solve made up mysteries.
18. What's your favorite holiday?
Thanksgiving for the massive food explosions.
19. What do you like to do in your spare time?
Pleasure myself and others, criticize my own songs, hose down pelicans that have been oiled by BP's gushing leak.
20. What kind of hidden talents do you have?
I can make you want to punch me in the face within moments of meeting me and I can sleep with your girlfriend without you or her ever even knowing about it.