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05:18 PM on 04/08/12 
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joexfm
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NJ
Male - 26 Years Old
After knowing and liking this girl for the past 2 years, we finally hit it off and started going on a few dates as of January. For the most part things are going pretty well. The only problem is that I only see her a few times a month because shes always away at school and I know for a fact that shes not ready to move further into an actual relationship. I have gotten to the point where I really want to lay out everything and tell her how I feel but I am too afraid of what she'll say because I know that she's not ready for a relationship. She's graduating this May and I was thinking of waiting until then to tell her since we will be seeing each other more often. Not sure if I should just wait it out and be patient or just get it off my chest. Help
05:20 PM on 04/08/12 
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Kassie09
in the empire business
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Pittsburgh, PA
Female - 24 Years Old
Ask her. What if some other dude swoops in and asks her out and she says yes? I mean, if she's graduating soon anyway, I think she can handle living far from you for one more month.
05:25 PM on 04/08/12 
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joexfm
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NJ
Male - 26 Years Old
Ask her. What if some other dude swoops in and asks her out and she says yes? I mean, if she's graduating soon anyway, I think she can handle living far from you for one more month.

very true. I mean we are at this point where we practically are exclusive to each other but I would like it to go in a further direction. I'm just afraid of rushing things, especially when shes not in that same mindset just yet.
05:30 PM on 04/08/12 
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tommylin
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Boston, MA
Male - 22 Years Old
After knowing and liking this girl for the past 2 years, we finally hit it off and started going on a few dates as of January. For the most part things are going pretty well. The only problem is that I only see her a few times a month because shes always away at school and I know for a fact that shes not ready to move further into an actual relationship. I have gotten to the point where I really want to lay out everything and tell her how I feel but I am too afraid of what she'll say because I know that she's not ready for a relationship. She's graduating this May and I was thinking of waiting until then to tell her since we will be seeing each other more often. Not sure if I should just wait it out and be patient or just get it off my chest. Help


Be patient, and trust your instincts...you will know when it is the right moment to tell her.
05:48 PM on 04/08/12 
#5
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joexfm
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NJ
Male - 26 Years Old
Be patient, and trust your instincts...you will know when it is the right moment to tell her.

Patience might be the best thing. It really eats away when you wanna get it off your chest already hah
06:29 PM on 04/08/12 
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ellie117
EAGLES, Phillies, Flyers, tacos.
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south jersey
Female - 24 Years Old
I jumped the gun on the "I love you" with my first [and only] real relationship. We were both 18, just graduating high school, we were friends for years before we started dating, and I dropped the bomb about 2 months into it. I really regretted it, because a few months later into the relationship what I was feeling got so much stronger and then I realized just how much he meant to me and regretted saying it so early because I finally knew what it meant and really meant it 'now' rather than then. If it matters, we broke up a year later. But, what we felt was still real.

I'd hold off a bit. Tell her good stuff like you like being around her, or you like where this is going. Don't drop the l-bomb, [if that's what you're planning] until you've reached the point where you're not afraid of her reaction. Or, until she finally says it.
06:42 PM on 04/08/12 
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joexfm
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NJ
Male - 26 Years Old
I jumped the gun on the "I love you" with my first [and only] real relationship. We were both 18, just graduating high school, we were friends for years before we started dating, and I dropped the bomb about 2 months into it. I really regretted it, because a few months later into the relationship what I was feeling got so much stronger and then I realized just how much he meant to me and regretted saying it so early because I finally knew what it meant and really meant it 'now' rather than then. If it matters, we broke up a year later. But, what we felt was still real.

I'd hold off a bit. Tell her good stuff like you like being around her, or you like where this is going. Don't drop the l-bomb, [if that's what you're planning] until you've reached the point where you're not afraid of her reaction. Or, until she finally says it.

I don't plan on dropping the l word at all, but what I feel for her is really strong already, especially since I barely see her because of her college. I really like where things are going but whats eating away is how I don't know how she really feels because she hasn't expressed her thoughts on the whole thing. I'm just afraid of losing her if I tell her how I feel about this whole thing and she reacts bad to it.
07:03 PM on 04/08/12 
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IV.
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Atlanta/Baltimore
Male - 29 Years Old
Ask her. What if some other dude swoops in and asks her out and she says yes? I mean, if she's graduating soon anyway, I think she can handle living far from you for one more month.

haha no way. If you in "something" and there may be a chance that someone could "swoop in" that there is no point in saying aything. haha really "swoop in"???


After knowing and liking this girl for the past 2 years, we finally hit it off and started going on a few dates as of January. For the most part things are going pretty well. The only problem is that I only see her a few times a month because shes always away at school and I know for a fact that shes not ready to move further into an actual relationship. I have gotten to the point where I really want to lay out everything and tell her how I feel but I am too afraid of what she'll say because I know that she's not ready for a relationship. She's graduating this May and I was thinking of waiting until then to tell her since we will be seeing each other more often. Not sure if I should just wait it out and be patient or just get it off my chest. Help

Just wait it out. The thing about most girls is they start dropping hints about things they want we just gotta be smart enough to catch them. Chances are if shes feeling the same way about itching to move forward with this she would let you know. Trust me i had a friend who would hang out with a girl a few times, catch feelings (which there is nothing wrong with) and then do the whole "so what are we now"? and the girls would dip out. Hang in there do your thing and have fun and dont get caught in the whole labeling yourselves and how many feelings you have for each other. just enjoy the time you have.
07:45 PM on 04/08/12 
#9
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Kassie09
in the empire business
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Pittsburgh, PA
Female - 24 Years Old
haha no way. If you in "something" and there may be a chance that someone could "swoop in" that there is no point in saying aything. haha really "swoop in"???




Just wait it out. The thing about most girls is they start dropping hints about things they want we just gotta be smart enough to catch them. Chances are if shes feeling the same way about itching to move forward with this she would let you know. Trust me i had a friend who would hang out with a girl a few times, catch feelings (which there is nothing wrong with) and then do the whole "so what are we now"? and the girls would dip out. Hang in there do your thing and have fun and dont get caught in the whole labeling yourselves and how many feelings you have for each other. just enjoy the time you have.

Swoop hahahahhahahah ha ha hah
07:48 PM on 04/08/12 
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SoCoSquid4
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green bay
Male - 28 Years Old
I jumped the gun on the "I love you" with my first [and only] real relationship. We were both 18, just graduating high school, we were friends for years before we started dating, and I dropped the bomb about 2 months into it. I really regretted it, because a few months later into the relationship what I was feeling got so much stronger and then I realized just how much he meant to me and regretted saying it so early because I finally knew what it meant and really meant it 'now' rather than then. If it matters, we broke up a year later. But, what we felt was still real.

I'd hold off a bit. Tell her good stuff like you like being around her, or you like where this is going. Don't drop the l-bomb, [if that's what you're planning] until you've reached the point where you're not afraid of her reaction. Or, until she finally says it.

diddo. dropped it on a girl i was seeing but wasnt dating. we were basically just friends with bennies. however, i actually did (do) love her, but things didnt work out. im still struggling getting over her. i definitely rushed in to telling her how i felt period. things then went too far and now ive basically lost her as a friend too.
11:39 PM on 04/08/12 
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Caleb Cabrera
gooby pls
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Mustang, Oklahoma
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Just wait until it feels right. There's no such thing as too early. If you feel it in your heart and you know it's true, say it.
11:53 PM on 04/08/12 
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endblazer
-never change-
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I'd say tell her, but keep it light. Just tell her you've got feelings for her and that you really enjoy spending time with her (no "L bombs"), and that if she's up for it, you'd like to try dating her/hanging out with her as more than just friends. Don't come on too strong, but make your feelings clear. If she responds well, great, and if she doesn't, don't make it weird, just politely tell her you understand and break any possible tension with a joke or something.
02:09 AM on 04/09/12 
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KatastrophiE
idiot savant
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I'd say tell her, but keep it light. Just tell her you've got feelings for her and that you really enjoy spending time with her (no "L bombs"), and that if she's up for it, you'd like to try dating her/hanging out with her as more than just friends. Don't come on too strong, but make your feelings clear. If she responds well, great, and if she doesn't, don't make it weird, just politely tell her you understand and break any possible tension with a joke or something.

sensibility
09:48 AM on 04/09/12 
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joexfm
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NJ
Male - 26 Years Old
Also, I've been having this problem where i feel like I have been so absorbed in overthinking this whole thing that I forget about what I need to do for myself. What's the best way to just relax and enjoy it for what it is?
10:05 AM on 04/09/12 
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tommylin
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Boston, MA
Male - 22 Years Old
Also, I've been having this problem where i feel like I have been so absorbed in overthinking this whole thing that I forget about what I need to do for myself. What's the best way to just relax and enjoy it for what it is?

The best way is just understanding yourself first and why your so absorbed in this situation, then accept it and yourself and go forward with your life.



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