Yeah, it's really difficult to stay calm, so I've admittedly given up on that haha. At this point I feel like my peers are old enough that they should understand privilege by now, and if they don't know this by their 20's then they know how to Google. I still try to reason, but I'm just realizing how pointless it seems lately. omg no sexism discussions are enough to get me angry for weeks, and I'm not an angry person haha. After tons of men have tried to tell me what is and isn't sexist, tell me I'm sensitive, overreacting, have no sense of humor, etc it''s just ugh. I hope most of them will grow up and realize that women are their wives/mothers/sisters/friends/daughters/etc and not just "stupid whores," but they can be a bitter bunch.
And yeah, a lot of white people need to constantly be reassured that they're not racist. It totally turns the discussion into a sensitive issue for the white people where they get all coddled to not feel like a big bad racist, which is so backwards.
I think I'm just going to start telling people to google it haha. I'm not an angry person either, but once we start talking about this kind of stuff I just can't stay calm. It's like, "You are thirty years old! How do you not
get this by now?". And yeah we're oversensitive, but if you mention 'patriarchy' it's "OMG NOEZ! WHAT ABOUT THE MEN!?!?!11!". And that is exactly what happened in this thread too. "Yeah there's racism, but you are just sensitive and WHAT ABOUT MEEEEEEEEE?1?!!? Whatever lol.
I'm glad someone gets it though :). So I'm just going to remember that next time it comes up and hopefully there are more people out there who understand than we realize.
Believe me, I'm with you for the most part! I still live in Texas and I've lost count of how many times I've had run-ins with asshole bullies growing up.
I want to expand on some of what you said though: I think a lot of hipster racism is coming from more of a white guilt place rather than one of wanting to live in a colorblind society. There are indeed plenty of people who use ironic racism to veil oldschool racism, though. I think some people who make racist jokes for the sake of irony are also fairly liberal and they feel like they are being anti-racist by no longer ignoring the issue and using every moment to make fun of racist thinking. That used to be my philosophy. But what I found over time, though, is that this doesn't work really well, because 1) those jokes should are EASY/OBVIOUS if you're not racist (which makes for shitty humor that really isn't that edgy) and 2) the logical conclusion of that humor is saying extremely fucked up stuff with a straight face for the sake of a laugh (luckily I never felt compelled to take it that far). It doesn't take into account that it can still be awkward, if not hurtful for an oppressed group. It's not cool to do what comedians/artists like Robert Crumb, John Maayer and Daniel Tosh do in society because, first off, they make a living off of it and a comfortable living at that. And second, if someone is making these jokes and they're white and are living in a nice part of town with lots of material possessions, they just look like a douche. The only real way to fight racism is to speak out against it from an attitude of empathy and love for underprivileged groups, to be intolerant of intolerance, and to help out underprivileged groups whenever and however possible. IMO. This has been my stance on it for some time. It should be more common, but unfortunately compassion is a rarity these days.
Omg the bolded, this this this. Jokes based on racist and sexist humor aren't funny anymore. Not because we don't have a sense of humor or we're 'oversensitive', but because we have heard them all before a million times
. And, yes, sometimes they are hurtful too, but mostly they're just not funny and if you rely on humor like that you're not funny
. You're not 'edgy' and 'pushing the envelope'. You're a hack. I also agree with what you say about being white and living large and then making fun of minorities. It's doubly painful when you take into account how many successful comics are white males. I'm not mad at them for being successful, but I do get a little mad that they're making their fortune on the backs of people who will probably not make it in that industry to tell their own stories and jokes. They cry when they get criticized for racism, but don't understand how painful it is to watch somebody profit off your pain. Same with guys who tell rape jokes. Now I don't want to write off that men can be and are raped or that women can be and are rapists, but it is overwhelmingly males who rape females. When 1 in 5 women are sexually assaulted in their lives, watching people from the demographic statistically most likely to hurt you tell you how hilarious it is when they do isn't funny. It's fucked up.
I agree with your stance on combating racism and I think a big part of this "ironic racism", which is indistinguishable from racist-racism, is because speaking up and out is hard. It's easier to make jokes that go with the status quo and say you are making fun of the racism itself, even though racists laugh at it too because it goes along with their worldview, than to actually confront someone for being jerks. And sorry that I went all ranty again, lol.