06:04 PM on 02/14/14
How do you guys deal with having a guy, who you like. But you are not sure where the relationship is at. I've slept with him, and he mostly ignores me. I don't know what to do
Thanks so much for wanting to hang out with us tonight! Man, situations with people that we like are so confusing sometimes! Totally true to the cliche though, if he doesn't seem to notice you anymore, you definitely deserve someone better! Most importantly, we need to sure that we love ourselves well before we commit to loving another person. It seems totally crazy, but it's so important to understand who we are in order to love those around us better. YOU are a beautiful person and never question that based on the actions of someone else. We love you dear, and happy love day!
06:09 PM on 02/14/14
I love that you guys do this. That you take the time to be with people on a night where there may be loneliness, maybe a questioning of worth, or scars from a lost love. Your presence speaks volumes to your supporters. Thank you for your love.
How have you guys seen how the painful times in your life have been used to either grow you, or change you in a positive way?
Hey Jordanwwoiteshek! Thanks so much for the kind words! We definitely love being able to connect with people far and wide.
In regards to your question, it's a process for each person and each situation. We definitely believe that situations that arise in our journeys shed light on life in general. For me personally, I definitely feel that all my experiences can reflect positive changes, but it can take up to years at times to see the positive come out of it. Sometimes it's just about breathing through the specific situation until you can see how things have changed. And change can come in totally different ways. It can come through how you view others, how you relate to others, the conversations you can have with others or how a community can grow together.
06:11 PM on 02/14/14
Hey guys! Christina here!!! So excited to join all of you for this love day! :)
06:14 PM on 02/14/14
Been a rough day. But I am thankful for the support TWLOHA has offered over the last seven years. <3
Thanks so much for hanging out with us and for the kind words. It's definitely one of those days that can be a drag, but here is a post that Jamie wrote a few years ago that may help lift your spirits today. http://twloha.com/blog/dear-valentines-day
We are here with you and we love you!
06:20 PM on 02/14/14
Hi everybody! Checking to see if I'm doing this right... this is my first live chat with twloha. Hoping to garner and give some encouragement. Rough times. :/
Thanks for joining us and you got it down already! :) It stinks that today has been kinda rough, but know that we are here with you. You might take some special encouragement from Jamie's recent TedTalk: http://twloha.com/blog/depression-an...scussion-guide
or even Jamie's blog post from a few years ago about Valentine's Day: http://twloha.com/blog/dear-valentines-day
Either way, never forget how special and unique you are. No one else can tell your story and no one else can feel what you feel, but community can lift you up and love you for who you are. :) We love you!
06:25 PM on 02/14/14
I relate to all of this so much.
My antidepressants worked for a while, but lately it's been questionable - just today my psychiatrist and I decided to switch me to a different one. But I don't know what I'm doing with anything, anymore. My motivation to keep fighting has gotten ridiculously low, and it's just really... sad. I feel disconnected from other people, society, everything.
Thanks so much for joining us today and sharing how you are feeling! It's a big deal to allow people to hear what you are thinking and how you feel. And it takes so much strength to admit when things aren't working. Changes aren't bad, but sometimes they take a while. Here is a blog that a past intern wrote about being in that same situation, but how reaching out to those around us can be the most uplifting action we can take: http://twloha.com/blog/You-Deserve-More-Than-Getting-By
Know that you are not alone and we love you!
06:30 PM on 02/14/14
I also have recently decided to turn the university of new hampshire chapter inactive. I wasn't getting the support from my fellow leaders and the student body and for my own health it was too much for me to do on my own. I felt guilty for a whole year trying to keep it alive but sometimes its not a good fit or the timings not right. I'm still struggling with the idea that I "failed" but I don't regret the experience of attending the uchapter conference and working to bring the TWLOHA mission to UNH.
we still matter.
it doesn't mean that we can't embody the mission on an individual basis.
Thanks for hanging out with us tonight and allowing TWLOHA to be such a big part of your college experience. While it does seem hard to let things go, that shows so much strength and self-knowledge to admit that something may not be working. You have put so much work into being hope and light and we definitely appreciate every minute of it, but you need to take care of yourself first and foremost. We have all been there, where we can be really disappointed in ourselves for things that may actually be out of our control. Don't let your identity be taken over by something that you need to let go though. You may have a million more opportunities arise because you are to use your time in other ways, but know that we are always with you and we love you!
06:34 PM on 02/14/14
So I've been on the road to recovery for many years now and as years have come and gone, so have different diagnoses, and even this last time in the hospital (just a few weeks ago) has brought everything into question again.
People keep saying, "Focus on the treatment" but I want the pieces of the puzzle to match, so to speak. Does anyone have any advice as to how I can be validated in my concern?
Thanks so much for hanging out with us tonight!
Each journey is unique to the individual and none or more important than another's, but that definitely doesn't mean they are easy. We can relate to times not making sense or working in our favor, but you can't let that define who you are. You are a beautiful individual. No matter what form the "treatment" takes, you are not the treatment. You are definitely validated in wanting to understand what is going on, but also know that sometimes we will never understand why things happen they way they do. There are so many moments that seem to pass without explanation, but please don't let them define you. You are not alone and we love you!
06:48 PM on 02/14/14
thanks, christina. i read jamie's old Valentine's day post a little bit ago and then the one you linked to brightened things up a bit as well.
i've been reaching out to other people so much lately, and only very few times has it proven at all worthwhile, sadly. it's incredibly lonely to exist, these days, even (and sometimes especially) in crowded rooms.
i leaned on one person so much, a year ago, and he left without warning in april, even though we knew it wouldn't be able to last, and that has been continuously destroying me since, even though i feel like i've gotten past it, and i've tried not to let it. it's hurting again tonight, especially. the sad part is that this holiday last year wasn't much better than tonight.
Even though people may not discuss it all that often, all of us have had moments where it seems we could be in a crowded room of people, yet no one can hear us. That definitely doesn't mean you are alone though. We would continue to encourage you to explore new communities or reach out to new people. Whether that is a trusted mentor or friend, or joining a group that you have always been interested in - making that first move is so brave and can be the most worthwhile move at times. Especially if you can tell that something won't last or is unhealthy for you, the best you can do to take care of yourself is let that situation go as soon as possible. That's not to say their won't be feelings of loss or pain, but if that's how you need to take care of yourself best then we would encourage you to do so. We also can't allow things to define us. Not situations, people or past experiences. You have a right to feel loss at someone that you were leaning on left you, but in it turn gives you a chance to allow others into your life. Here is another blog
about living in community. Even if loving yourself better means making a change that seems scary, if it leads to a healthier you, surround yourself with those who can help you make that change.
The best thing about some days, is that we never need to live some days over again. So even though this day seems to hurt in a similar way to the last one, it isn't the same day and things will change. It may just take time.
06:50 PM on 02/14/14
Thanks so much for joining us tonight! We are really excited to be hanging out with everyone too :)
06:52 PM on 02/14/14
Thanks for hanging out with us tonight! It's so encouraging for us to hear that and that you would chose to spend some time hanging out with us. :) Each year we get so excited to hang out with people and spend time in such a wonderful community.
06:54 PM on 02/14/14
Hey! About the reason to keep fighting/stay on the road to recovery...a big part of my fighting for recovery and my commitment was how much I wanted to be a story for hope for other people. I wanted to be able to share my story and how I was able to overcome, and I knew if I wanted to do that, I would have to actually stick with it myself.
Thanks for choosing to hang out with us and for wanting to share hope with other people. It is so inspiring to see those around us choosing to love themselves and others well. Whether that means reaching out for help or choosing a different path for life, it takes incredible bravery to make those changes. You are inspiring to us and know that you are never alone.
06:57 PM on 02/14/14
Valentine's Day is never easy for me. I am so glad you guys do this and let people know that you're not alone. It took me years to speak out about abuse that occurred on a Valentine's Day and you guys have helped me so much!
Thanks so much for joining us tonight and being willing to speak out about your experiences. In a lot of ways, Valentine's Day sin't fun for a lot of us for various reasons. Whether it's about experiences or pressure or reminding us that we may not be doing what is "socially expected" on this day, it's definitely a hard day for a lot of people. We are so honored that you have allowed us to be a part of your story so far. Thank you for sharing this with us and we would encourage you to continue reaching out in your community so they can uplift you as well. We love you.
07:01 PM on 02/14/14
I just wanted to drop in with a special love note. I have recently been exposed to what TWLOHA is all about and I cannot help but be behind everything you stand for. You exemplify what truly matters in each and every one of our valuable lives. I thank you for being completely present and providing a platform that allows others to simply and completely be open to a community that does nothing but love people well
Thank you for hanging out with us tonight and for your encouraging words! So many people can relate to needing love and understanding, but sometimes it's hard to reach out when you or others may be hurting. We hope that while people continue to learn about and support our organization, they would also be beacons of hope and light in their communities. With learning how to love themselves and those around them well. We love you!
07:07 PM on 02/14/14
does anyone knows where a guy named "jacob" from twloha staff went? I need to talk with him! Last year he replied to me and gave me a link "street team" so...thanks Jacob! :)
Thanks for joining us again this year! Thanks for asking about Jacob was an intern last year, but does not work at TWLOHA currently. It's really exciting to hear about you joining the Street Team, we hope that you are enjoying it. Is there anything we could help you out with?
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