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Shane Told Sports Blog: "Out of Bounds"

Posted by: Drew Beringer (06/24/14)
Shane Told (Silverstein) is back with another sports blog in which he offers another perspective on the incident involving Tigers Jaw. Check it out in the replies.
But we are. Everyone is the same. Whether it's a boy or girl singing on stage or someone walking down the street or in a classroom, no one should have to deal with being touched or sexually assaulted. For some reason musicians on stage are viewed as some kind of approachable sex symbols. And I'm sure a lot of people have seen a girl get on stage and hug a lead singer and not thought twice about whether or not they wanted to be hugged. But I certainly wouldn't walk up to a girl on the street I thought was cool or attractive and do that.
        
 
Displaying posts 1 - 15 of 61
11:25 AM on 06/24/14
#2
Drew Beringer
Senior Editor - @drewberinger - Locked Groove
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Out of BoundsI go to more sporting events than the average person. I'm not a season's ticket holder for anything, and I'm certainly not following any teams around the country. But at least a few times a year I go to see all the teams I like whether it's in my home town of Toronto or when I'm on tour.

And I have been on the field exactly zero times.

I know you're thinking "of course you never went on the field! You'd get kicked out, maybe arrested!" And it's true. I probably would. Even falling onto the field by accident trying to pick up a groundball would result in an ejection. And as much as I do truly love Blue Jays 3rd basemen Brett Lawrie, I have never ran on the field to try and give him a smooch.

But I also go to a lot of shows. I go see bands in pretty large venues. Sometimes even 2500-3500 people. And I have definitely been on stage. Stage dove, crowd surfed, all that good stuff. In my younger days I had band members react very differently to it. Sometimes I'd have a scary stage tech usher me off. Sometimes it was very gentle, sometimes quite violent, but most of the time the band was stoked and some even encouraged me to sing along, or high fived me, or gave me a bro hug. It was no big deal for the most part.

But lately there has been a lot going on in our music scene with band members being "touched without permission". Myself, being the lead singer of a band on tour for over 11 years have had my fair share of the "bad touch" as we call it. I have been kissed, humped, hugged, groped, licked, tackled, spanked, fondled, you name it, more times than I could ever count. I definitely don't like it. But am I going to make a huge press statement when some 15 year old girl gets on stage and tries to kiss me on the cheek? Am I going to stop the song when a girl grabs me between the legs and spoil the show for everyone else? I remember Spencer from Underoath and I talked about this stuff once and he said he had someone grab his junk, "almost every day". And he hated it. I hate it too and it still happens to me very frequently. But really, what can I do?

Maybe I'm crazy comparing guys like Spencer and me to professional athletes. Maybe it's completely different. After all they are millionaires and generate huge TV revenues. We're just guys riding in busses and vans and making modest incomes. We're not the same.

But we are. Everyone is the same. Whether it's a boy or girl singing on stage or someone walking down the street or in a classroom, no one should have to deal with being touched or sexually assaulted. For some reason musicians on stage are viewed as some kind of approachable sex symbols. And I'm sure a lot of people have seen a girl get on stage and hug a lead singer and not thought twice about whether or not they wanted to be hugged. But I certainly wouldn't walk up to a girl on the street I thought was cool or attractive and do that.

Maybe there's partly a double standard when it comes to the sex of the person. We view a young girl hugging a 30 year old male singer in much different light than a 30 year old man hugging a 19 year old female musician. But regardless, it is not right.

So next time you're at a show and get on stage don't touch anyone or anything. The band has a show to put on for the hundreds maybe thousands of other people there and really no one cares that you're on stage. So do your stage-dive (safely as to not hurt anyone else) and then think twice if you really need to get on stage again. Believe me, the band loves the enthusiasm, but we also would rather not be physically interacted with regardless of your intentions.
11:30 AM on 06/24/14
#3
texan4lif281
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He's right in every aspect. People need to get that through their thick skulls.
11:35 AM on 06/24/14
#4
WordsandMusic
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I feel like this horse has been glue for a few days already...
11:35 AM on 06/24/14
#5
Dave Diddy
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I wasn't aware male singers got their dicks grabbed on stage so much. That seems so odd to me that anyone would do that.
11:37 AM on 06/24/14
#6
thesinkingship
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I wasn't aware male singers got their dicks grabbed on stage so much. That seems so odd to me that anyone would do that.
It's odd that there would be asshole fans that would want to grab their junk? Seems pretty predictable to me.
11:38 AM on 06/24/14
#7
musicfan9795
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Gotta agree with Shane on this one. The sports metaphor definitely drives this whole Tigers Jaw story home.
11:40 AM on 06/24/14
#8
rob_mylo
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Gotta love Shane.

Agree with this completely.
11:55 AM on 06/24/14
#9
xBranx
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Love this.
12:04 PM on 06/24/14
circletheworld
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well put
12:09 PM on 06/24/14
Spencer Control
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Shane has always struck me as a real stand-up guy. Point well-made.
12:14 PM on 06/24/14
FTank
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Inb4 "let it go you're all beating a dead horse"
12:37 PM on 06/24/14
LexXchaos
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I'm glad more and more people are speaking out about this. This is not a new problem, and it has been way overdue for being addressed. This isn't something that musicians (or anyone, obviously) should just deal with. Being touched inappropriately is a horrible, horrible feeling, and I have no idea how someone could deal with that almost every day.
I really hope more fans realize what they're doing and learn to respect their favorite musicians. Something like this shouldn't even be happening.
12:41 PM on 06/24/14
ACA
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You can tell there is a lot more he wants to say, but you have to keep your mouth shut in 2014 for fear of how its (mis)interpreted. That is a shame, especially for a community/scene/genre that is long built on not having to be so tactful when expressing your opinions.
12:42 PM on 06/24/14
Atavistic
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this story is the most boring drama, can't there be some macbook scams or something? fuck.
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